5. My job as a ministry wife is to serve people.
OK, yes, I serve people. But people are not who I am ultimately serving. Like No. 1 listed above, there is such a subtle difference between the two that I find this lie the easiest to believe. After all, ministry is about people, being with people and meeting the needs of people. But if people are my primary motivation, if I look to them for cues of what I should be doing, how I should be doing it or how well I am doing it, ministry easily becomes a chore and a losing game. Ministry is about serving God, looking to him for direction and for power to fulfill what He asks, and doing all of it to please him. Serving people is a natural byproduct of serving God. Mrs Pastor: Yes! Yes! Yes! So ensure that what you are doing is pleasing God**** - not focused on pleasing man - women and children included of course...
6. I have to
be available to everyone at all times.
How’s this for a big fat lie: I have
to be at everything, do everything, say yes to every request and know everyone
equally. We know this is a lie because if any woman tried to do all these
things, she would be a boundary-less blob of crazy. She would have no good friends,
no time to rest, and would be saying no to her family at every turn so she
could say yes to everyone else. In fact, if she has pinpointed the deceit of
No. 5 and seeks God’s leadership in her time and decisions, she will have
priority time for the Lord, for her husband and family, and for rest. She will,
in fact, be sane.
Mrs Pastor: My take on this is simple: When you become Omnipotent, Omniscient and Omnipresent then you will easily be available to everyone, at all times for any and everything. Until then, my advice is: "Learn to say "No" without feeling guilty (sometimes) at least for your own sanity."
7. I can’t
ask for help or reveal my weaknesses and struggles.
Ah yes, this one. This is a
modern-day version of the “the pastor’s wife can’t have friends in the church”
lie, birthed out of the Pinterest and Facebook era of cultivating a good
exterior and being reluctant to admit weakness. This isn’t always the ministry
wife’s fault, but instead a cyclical pattern between the church and its
leaders. A ministry wife, for example, may share something with a trusted
friend, and either that friend has no idea of how to respond or they blab it to
others, causing the ministry wife to retreat back into herself. It’s a lie
either way, this idea that a ministry wife doesn’t have struggles or that she
shouldn’t be able to safely reveal them to others so as to receive the ministry
of the church.
Ministry wives, here are the truths:
Your identity is as a daughter of
God. You are approved and beloved by him.
You are called to a man who is
called into the ministry, therefore you are called into ministry.
God only expects you to be you and
to use the specific gifts he’s given you.
You are influential and important in
the work God is doing through his church.
You are serving God, not people,
although you will serve people as an outflow of serving God.
It’s proper and right to set limits
because you are limited person.
You need the church because you need
sanctification and community.
Which of these lies do you most
often believe? What lies would you add to the list?
* http://www.outreachmagazine.com/features/20207-ministry-wives.html#.WB2RAl37gVk.email
** http://mrs-pastor-and-pastor-mrs.blogspot.com/2016/11/7-lies-ministry-wives-believe.html
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