I know some of us do feel (& are) stretched as Mrs Pastor while some just feel (or are) shelved i.e. you used to be in the choir, an usher or a greeter and now you're "Mrs. Pastor."If you me, ask I'd say either end of the scale can be stressful... doing too much or close to nothing is really "tiring" and can lead to more misery rather than more ministry if not identified and dealt with.
Personally, I'd rather be in active service than sitting on the shelf so I understand when a Mrs Pastor says that she was more engaged and effective as a member of the church than as Mrs Pastor. Just as being shelf is no fun, neither is being on a pedestal. The fact that you're Mrs Pastor does not mean you should be excused from the work and just walk (or sit) beside your husband. Yes, you must be (and remain) an asset not an accessory - accessories gather dust.I do know that there is no clear Job description for Mrs Pastor (something I've written about before*), so one thing you need to be clear about is your purpose.** And dare I say, your purpose is beyond you so you really cannot afford to "sit on the shelf" and gather dust - like books and accessories do. If you're blessed to be in a church where there are many hands that make the work light, stay engaged even if in a supervisory capacity. Supervising and providing spiritual cover is not the same thing as being snoopy - nor is it a reason to sit back let the ministry work go sloppy on your watch. It's a delicate balance to be maintained because no one ever said that being hands-off should translate to hearts-off... it never should.
This was something I'm so glad the Lord drummed into my heart & head last year.
We're blessed to be a growing church with more hands able to work - and more becoming available so it's easy to start feeling sidelined instead of being grateful that there are more hands on the plough hence you can cover more lands & lives simultaneously. This is actually a good segway to 2 other things that struck me:
If you feel stretched, it may be a signal that you need to scale back and start coaching and delegating tasks to others. I agree the that there are tasks you cannot delegate e.g. cooking meals for your husband (& children) but you can delegate the care and teaching of children in church, admin, organizing tasks etc.
If you feel you're on the shelf, rather than gather dust, seek opportunities to pour yourself into others by personal touch (e.g. by mentoring or volunteering) - and you can do these within and outside your church. If you need to, look outside church for other ministry opportunities that align with your passion and don't interfere with the proper and prompt execution of your Mrs Pastor "role & responsibilities" if they are clearly articulated. Even if they are not, I'm sure you know what you need to do in and for your church - just as your marriage comes before ministry, your (local) ministry comes before missions.
Personally, I'm really looking forward to a great year of new lands to be covered.The bottom-line, as I was reminded & enjoyed last year, is: whether you're on the shelf or feel stretched, the best thing is to stay plugged into prayer - that's definitely one area of ministry where we can never gather dust and remain an asset.
Wishing us all a wonderful year ahead - may our value as assets appreciate...
References:
* http://mrs-pastor-and-pastor-mrs.blogspot.ca/2012/01/except-you-areyoure-not.html
** http://mrs-pastor-and-pastor-mrs.blogspot.ca/2012/05/what-is-your-purpose.html
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