I remember a friend who teased me about getting ready to cook and host sometime after my husband started pastoring. I smiled & wondered with a "Hmmm?" - in my mind of course. I've noticed that a number of "hosts" and "hostesses" - Mrs. Pastors included - miss the point of hospitality and hosting which is why this question "To host or not host?" popped in my heart.
Since we all agree that from time to time, we will need to host (or be hosted), I felt it will be space well used (and time well spent) if we take some space and time to look into what we should do when we have people over in our homes.
There's a lot to learn from Martha who hosted Jesus - let's read Luke 10: 38-42
While Jesus and his followers [they] were traveling, Jesus went into a town [village]. A woman named Martha let Jesus stay at her house [welcomed/received him]. Martha had a sister named Mary, who was sitting at the Lord’s feet and listening to him teach [what he said; his word/message; sitting at a teacher’s feet indicates the position of a disciple; see Acts 22:3]. But Martha was busy [worried; distracted] with all the work to be done [the many preparations]. She went in and said, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me alone to do all the work [serve; prepare the meal]? [Please; Therefore] Tell her to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried [anxious] and upset about many things. Only one thing is important [necessary; needed]. Mary has chosen the better thing, and it will never be taken away from her.”*** (italics mine)Note that she welcomed Jesus into her home then busied herself preparing possibly a sumptous meal for Jesus and his disciples that she "forgot" about him. Personally, I find that sometimes when we have guests, I spend more quality time with the preps and the food than with the people in "fellowship."
Let's learn from Abraham whose experience in Gen 18 & Lot's in Gen 19 must have been the reason for the advice in Hebrews 13:2 (see below). With Sarah's help, Abraham was able to host 3 men and it was in spending time with them that he received his heart desire. Likewise, whenever we host or visit others, we must realize that the fellowship with them is more important than the food.
Sometimes I prepare for guests in advance so I have time for/with them when they come. At other times, when we have unexpected guests, I invite one or some of them (depending on who of course) to join me in the preparations so we spend time together that way. I believe that hosting others is only of use when you add value to other people's lives - and that takes more than nice meal.
When, not if, you host, be a blessing.
References:
*Requirement for every Christian:
1 Pet 4:9 - Open your homes [Be hospitable] to each other, without complaining [grumbling]. (Expanded Bible)
Heb 13:2 - Don’t neglect to open up your homes to guests, because by doing this some have been hosts to angels without knowing it. (Common English Bible)
Rom 12:13 - Share with God’s people [the saints] who need help. Bring strangers in need into your homes [Pursue/Be eager to show hospitality]. (Expanded Bible)
**1 Tim 3:2 - An overseer must not give people a reason to criticize him [have a good reputation; be above reproach], and he must have only one wife [or be faithful to his wife]. He must be self-controlled [sober], wise [have good judgment], respected by others, ready to welcome guests [hospitable], and able to teach. (Expanded Bible - italics mine)
Titus 1: 8 - Rather, he must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must love what is good. He must live wisely and be just. He must live a devout and disciplined life. (NLT - italics mine)
***Expanded Bible
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