Be Yourself
I don’t know what your picture of a
pastor’s wife is but most of us have one. I actually didn’t have one, because I
was brought up in the Brethren church which had no pastors, relying as it did
on lay preachers and elders. As well as that, our first church was an
international, non-denominational church which meant that we had over 20
nationalities and many denominations as well. So everyone’s background was
different and everyone’s point of view was valid. We had no traditions and we
could never say we did something because that was the way we had always done
it. There probably were expectations of the pastor’s wife – but they would have
been so different from person to person that I was free to use and develop
whatever gifts God had given me, which was a tremendous privilege.Nevertheless, I have been aware down through the years that there have been certain things expected of me – from the sublime to the not-so-sublime. Some feel that the pastor’s wife should lead the women’s ministry; others that she should take a very public role within the church; others that she should play the piano; others that she should stand at the door with her husband and say goodbye to each member of the congregation as they leave the church. (I didn’t do the latter – it was too cold out there and anyway, I have never been good at small talk. I was much happier spending that time chatting to those who had stayed for a coffee after the service.) Mrs P: "I'm more than a Pastor's wife" is one of the best books I've read - and I've written about it.**
Be thankful
Remember to be thankful for the privilege
of the calling. Depending on how it’s going, what season of life you’re in, how
your kids are coping, and many other factors, you may find it easy to be
thankful and you may find it hard.But don’t forget the immense privilege it is to serve people in a congregation. You get to celebrate the births of their babies, you are invited to join them on their wedding days, and you are there to comfort them when they are grieving. Through all the vicissitudes of life, you are invited to share their stories with them. There are few jobs which offer such an intimate knowledge of people. It is a huge responsibility – and it is a huge privilege. Cherish it. Be thankful that God has entrusted such a gift to you. And guard their secrets to yourself. Mrs P: I smiled when I read this - it reminded me of my piece on "Basket or Bucket?"*** Nice to know I'm not the only one who deems it important - not that it matters if I was the only one who thought so. When we betray people's confidence, we disappoint God, not just the people.
When a church is functioning well, it is something which brings God so much pleasure. I remember being moved almost to tears as I sat in a prayer meeting for prodigals in one of our churches and listened to men and women plead with God for others who had strayed from Him. It felt like holy ground.
I have felt the same way when someone has invited me to share their struggles and made me part of their story. To see a woman who was at the end of her rope coming through to the place where she has found hope again is such an amazing privilege. That God should allow me to be a little part of that is truly humbling.
Gail MacDonald has written a book called ‘High Call, High Privilege’ – and that is what our calling is as pastors’ wives. May God help us to find balance in our lives as we juggle so many balls in the air, so that we will be able to serve Him well and rejoice in the high call and high privilege He has given us. Mrs P: Yes it is a high calling.**** Whatever you do- or even accomplish - don't be high-minded - remain humble and thankful. My prayer is that we'll all accomplish great and mighty things to God’s glory - things that will make Him glad, not sad, that He gave us the privilege of being Mrs. Pastor. AMEN!
References:
* http://talesfromtaughlumny.wordpress.com/ministry-matters/twelve-tips-for-pastors-wives/
****http://mrs-pastor-and-pastor-mrs.blogspot.ca/2012/07/its-high-calling.html
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